Blocked Care can quietly shape the emotional experience of caregiving, particularly when children and young people have experienced trauma and respond in defensive or rejecting ways. This reflective self-assessment has been developed to support carers to gently notice when their nervous system may be under strain and when connection may be feeling harder than usual.

This checklist is not a diagnostic tool. Rather, it offers a structured opportunity for reflection, helping carers identify early signs of emotional fatigue, disconnection, or compassion stress so that support can be sought before relationships become further strained.

Key messages

• Blocked care is not a failure of love or commitment. It is a protective response of the brain under chronic stress.
• Recognising the signs early can prevent shame from taking root and allow carers to seek reflective support.
• Self-compassion is central. Healing begins when carers feel safe enough to acknowledge their own emotional experience.
• Blocked care impacts both carers and children. Understanding the shared stress loop creates space for compassion on both sides.
• Reconnection does not require perfection. Small moments of safety, regulation and shared meaning can gradually reopen the circuits of care.